Herman Munster Not A Suspect — Correction

Correction — the Dingle erroneously reported today that Herman Munster was a suspect in the recent truck attack in Muenster, Germany.

Herman Munster was not in the country at the time of the attack and should not have been named.

Lilly Munster also is not considered a suspect, although police do not know if she was in the vicinity at this time.

Grandpa Munster apparently was last seen in a diner on the upper west side of Manhattan, on Amsterdam avenue.  Most of the sandwiches in that diner were served with Swiss cheese, though, not muenster.

Eddie Munster was killed in a separate attack which had nothing to do with terrorism, cheese or sixties sitcoms.

But Marylyn Munster, the weird one, is reportedly a person of interest that the police want to question regarding the attack.

Which, as I mentioned earlier, took place in Muenster, Germany, a town of 300,000 people also known for the cheese and the terrific television program that shares its name, minus the letter e.

The Adams family, specifically Gomez Adams, demanded that people not lump his family in with the Munsters just because they were both horror/comedy sixties shows.

“This event was a tragedy,” said Adams, “But it doesn’t mean that every Halloween themed sitcom family is no longer to be trusted.  What about Wizards of Waverly Place, for instance?  Doesn’t that show feature a sandwich shop with occasional muenster cheese?  Why are they not a suspect, just because they are in color and we were in black and white?  Well, that’s just discrimination.  Or what about Harry Potter?  Has anybody seen him lately?  I heard he appeared nude on stage in a play.  Why aren’t police asking questions about him?  Just because he’s British and he sounds fancy?  I don’t think that’s fair.  Also, I think I already died of a stroke, so how is it that I am even talking?  No, wait a minute, that was Raul Julia who played me in the theatrical version.”

Thing was reportedly busy making Gomez Adams a sandwich with plain American Cheese, pre-sliced.  Cousin It was getting a hair cut.  Wednesday was last seen on Tuesday and Pugsly was being fat shamed into giving up cheese entirely.