Everything you thought you knew about _____ is wrong.
Yes, I know, I’m just a dumb writer and this is just another dumb intro to another dumb article you’re wasting your life reading but guess what? If you stick with it, you will find the truth about _________.
I write ______ because that’s how dangerous my ideas are. If I wrote out the name of the subject that I am writing about, I might become a target of subversion, oppression, revenge, spite, or even worse. That’s why, to keep it safe, I’m just writing _________.
Do you know what I mean by _______________. You think you do. But that’s another thing you are wrong about. You are wrong, then, about two things. About what the subject of my article is, and about that subject itself. I’m actually talking about something else. And everything you believe about that something else also happens to be one hundred percent, completely incorrect.
Of course, I’m not going to give you the truth about ______________ right away. You’re going to have to stick around to find that. And how do you know that I really know the truth about ___________?
You don’t.
I might be full of it. But anyhow, I’m making this claim. And I think it has captured your interest. Am I right?
I thought so.
I don’t mean to blow your mind, but I just can’t help myself. Are you ready? In a minute I will tell you the truth about ___________.
I do this because I am a really great person. And really smart too. And that’s why I do it. Because I want you to be disabused of this incorrect notion you have about ___________.
I mean, really, where did you get these ridiculous ideas about ____________?
Yes, it’s true. Until I came along, humble writer that I am, nobody really knew how wrong they were about ___________. Everybody else in the entire world was busy trying to fill your head with wrong ideas. Your teachers were wrong. Your peers were wrong. Your parents were wrong. Your doctor was wrong. They were all wrong.
They didn’t know this truth about ____________ .
I am now going to reveal the truth about ____________.
You have earned this.
You really have.
You have stuck around. You have made it to the end of the article. Here goes.
The truth about _______________ is this.
Click here to see the truth about _____________.
And now that you know the truth about ______________ this is the end of the article. This is like that last bit on a ski hill after the main slope is over. We skiers call it the run out.
This is the run out.
And that was the truth about _____________
And now, this is the end.